


Things that Go Bump in the Night

by Alidravana



Series: SEAL Team Week 2021 [1]
Category: SEAL Team (TV)
Genre: Angst, Childhood Trauma, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, M/M, Memory Loss, SEAL Team (TV) Week 2021
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:02:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28836750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alidravana/pseuds/Alidravana
Summary: Combination of Day 1 (Childhood)  and Day 2 (Memory Loss) prompts for SEAL Team (TV) Week 2021.Some discomfort in the night leads to startling realizations for Trent.Please read warnings and tags carefully.  Childhood trauma and sexual abuse implied.
Relationships: Trent Sawyer/Clay Spenser
Series: SEAL Team Week 2021 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2171745
Comments: 8
Kudos: 60





	1. Chapter 1

Clay jerked awake. He looked around the room in confusion as to why he woke up, when the reason for his discomfort quickly became apparent. There was a warm puddle forming under his body. 

It’s okay, Clay told himself, trying to remain calm. His therapist says that bedwetting is nothing to be embarrassed about. He just needs to get up, strip the bed, and have a shower. “Nothing to be embarrassed about,” Clay whispered softly, as he started to get out of bed. He reached out to turn on his reading light, but it wasn’t where it normally was. Clay looked around the room in confusion. That wasn’t his night table. This wasn’t the side of bed he normally slept on. Clay glanced down at himself, relieved to at least recognize his own sleep pants. But this wasn’t his bedroom. Where the hell was he? 

Clay stumbled out of bed, snagging a sweatshirt that was laying on the floor and quickly slid it on. His hands were shaking too much to hold the zipper in place, so he just pulled the sides tight around him. Where was he? What happened? His legs couldn’t hold him up any longer and he collapsed on the floor, tears starting to fall down his cheeks. But he didn’t make a sound. That wasn’t allowed.

Earlier, Trent had stirred when Clay first shifted in the bed but then fell back asleep. But at the sound of a loud thump in the bedroom, Trent sprung to his feet, reaching for a weapon that wasn’t there. Years of being a SEAL, and a medic, allowed him to quickly assess the situation. He felt his heart break when he looked over at his boyfriend silently crying in the corner, covered up in his oversized college sweatshirt. Trent wanted to rush over and gather Clay up in his arms, but knew that that might make things worse. 

Trent took a couple deep breaths and tried to recall everything that he had read about these sorts of scenarios. He had hoped never to have to use the skills he had learned in his PTSD classes but at the same time, wasn’t surprised that he had to use them for Clay. “Clay, babe?” Trent said quietly, seeing if he could get his boyfriend’s attention. “I’m going to turn on the light, okay?” He reached out and clicked on the lights. There was no response from Clay.

“Clay, it’s Trent,” Trent tried again to get Clay’s attention, walking around to Clay’s side of the bed but still keeping a good distance. “Bravo 4?” He added, hoping that the military designation might help. And it did. Clay looked directly at him.

Clay could hear someone talking to him but couldn’t figure out who it was. It was like he was trapped in a dream, where he couldn’t hear or speak properly. He tensed when the unknown male came around the bed, but then relaxed a bit when he recognized a fellow brother. 

“Clay, how can I help?” Trent asked, not sure what to do next. He wanted to ask if Clay was alright, but that was obviously a silly question to ask. He sat down on the floor, not wanting to appear intimidating in any way.

Clay thought for a few minutes, playing with the string on the hoodie, trying to figure out what to ask without embarrassing himself further. He was starting to remember the previous night. Trent had taken him out for dinner for his birthday and then they hit the Bulkhead to drink with the team. Clay had too many beers to safely drive home and when Trent offered for him to sleep it off at his place, he jumped at the opportunity to stay over at his boyfriend’s place. He glanced over to the bed, the wet spot now clearly visible in the brightened bedroom.

Clay jumped up and started stripping the bed. He was so embarrassed. His first time sleeping over at Trent’s and he goes and wets the bed. They didn’t even have sex. “I’m sorry about your sheets,” Clay managed to choke out, tears starting up again. “I’ll…” Clay paused, having trouble getting the words out. “I’ll buy you some new ones.” 

Trent could feel some tears of his own coming and quickly rubbed his own eyes to keep them at bay. “Clay, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.” He said clearly, taking the sheets that Clay had gathered and tossing them out into the hallway. “Now please, how can I help you?”

Clay looked over at Trent in amazement. He wasn’t kicking him out? Or laughing at him? Or running in the other direction? He fiddled with the hoodie string a bit more, and then clued in that it wasn’t even his sweatshirt, that it must be Trent’s. He looked over at his boyfriend, and realized how upset he looked. But Clay was pretty sure that it wasn’t because of wet sheets. “I have a therapist,” Clay blurted out, shocked at his own admission. “I’m talking to someone and I think it’s helping,” Clay added, wanting Trent to know that he was looking after his own health. 

“I’m proud of you for doing that Clay,” Trent replied, knowing how hard it is for Clay to admit that he needs help. How hard it is for anyone to ask for help, especially SEALs. 

“Can we have a shower?” Clay asked, changing the topic quickly. He didn’t want to talk anymore about what had happened and he could feel the wet fabric of his sleep pants cling uncomfortably to his skin. He really wanted to get clean but didn’t want Trent to go anywhere. 

“Definitely,” Trent replied, leading the way to his washroom and turning on the shower to get the water warmed up. “Are you sure you want me here?” Trent asked, making sure that he understood what Clay was referring to before. He really wanted to hold Clay after what happened but didn’t want to cross any boundaries that Clay may need.

Clay nodded and stripped quickly out of his clothes and into the shower. He reached out an arm and pulled Trent in behind him, sighing as Trent wrapped his arms around his waist. This was safe. He was safe. Trent was safe. Now his mind just needed a bit more practice.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of 2 for Day 5 ("It's things like these that keep me up at night.") for SEAL Team (TV) Week 2021.

Trent couldn’t stop thinking. 

Trent continued to hold his boyfriend in the shower in a gentle embrace, only shifting a few times as Clay quickly washed himself. He wanted to wrap himself around Clay and never let go. But at the same time, thoughts were racing through his mind. What had caused Clay to react the way he did? Was it a nightmare? Trent felt a sharp pain in his chest that nearly took his breath away. Was it him? Did he somehow scare Clay? He quickly pulled his left hand from the small of Clay’s back, not noticing the flash of sadness that flitted across his boyfriend’s face at the loss of contact.

“I’ll be right back with some fresh pajamas,” Trent stammered, and escaped the steamy bathroom. He hustled back to the bedroom, trying to escape his thoughts, but the wet spot on the mattress wouldn’t let him. Throwing a towel down first, Trent set about re-making the bed and snagging a couple pairs of plaid sleep pants from his bottom drawer. He took a deep breath and tried to collect his thoughts. He needed to be patient and not jump to any conclusions. Clay had wanted him in the shower, wanted to be held...

“Hey, do you have those bottoms?” Clay asked quietly, leaning on the door frame, a bath towel hanging low on his hips. He had been concerned when Trent didn’t come back to the bathroom and that concern didn’t go away when he found Trent with his head in his hands. He hadn’t had an accident with someone else in bed for a while, that he wasn’t really sure what to do. If it had been anyone other than Trent, he probably would have slid out the back door and never seen that person again. They had only been dating for a few months now, since that crazy op in Khost, but multiple years having each other’s backs as brothers allowed them to slide into an actual relationship with ease. He really didn’t want to let it go.

Trent looked up, startled at Clay’s presence. He hadn’t heard him arrive at all. “Uh,” he said, still thrown off by Clay’s sudden arrival, that he forgot that he had the pants right in his hands. “Here,” he said, throwing a pair over to Clay and quickly pulling on his own pair, trying to avert his eyes while his boyfriend took his towel off but couldn’t help taking a sneak peak. “Ready to come back to bed?” He asked, unsure of what Clay’s answer would be as he slid under the covers.

“Definitely,’ Clay responded, snuggling in under Trent’s arm. He tucked himself tight to Trent, resting his head on his chest, and avoiding the one side of the bed. He had seen Trent check him out when he was getting dressed. The little moment of normalcy helped calm his nerves and he fell to sleep rather quickly, comfortable and safe in Trent’s arms.

Trent took a lot longer to fall asleep. He couldn’t stop thinking.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of 2 for Day 5 ("It's things like these that keep me up at night.") for SEAL Team (TV) Week 2021.

The next few weeks crawled by. Bravo team was spun up briefly to assist with a terrorist situation in the UK, but other than that, the time was spent running hills and drills. On a more personal note, Trent spent a couple nights over at Clay’s but they continued to avoid Trent’s apartment. Trent just couldn’t stop thinking about waking and finding Clay huddled in the corner of his room. Heck, he couldn’t even sleep in his own room, and had spent most of the nights at his place on the couch. 

Trent knew that he needed to talk to someone. Someone other than Clay. It wasn’t Clay’s responsibility to help him process what happened, especially not when it might traumatize Clay further. Trent knew that he couldn’t talk to a military therapist, as their files are easily accessible to the upper ranks. And he was hesitant to ask a fellow brother, as this was Clay’s secret to reveal, not his own. After going through all his remaining options, Trent settled on attempting to talk to Ray’s wife, Naima. He had relied on her advice related to medicine many times, hopefully she wouldn’t mind discussing a more personal issue.

Now Trent found himself standing outside the Perry household, holding a tray of hot beverages from a local coffee shop, and running his hand nervously through his hair. He took a deep breath and rang the doorbell. Trent had tried to time his visit while the kids were at school, and so he was a bit surprised when Jameelah answered the door.

“Hi!” She said, a little out of breath from running to the door. “Are you here to see dad? He’s just out back with Junior.”

Trent shook his head, smiling down at Ray’s oldest. “I was actually hoping to talk to your mom. Is she around?”

Jameelah nodded, and shouted back into the house for her mom who answered that she would be there in a minute. She stood awkwardly at the door, looking like she wanted to go back to playing but also wanted to wait with Trent. 

“I’m fine to wait here by myself,” Trent reassured Jameelah. “Why don’t you go back out and play? And can you take this carefully back for your dad?” Trent pulled out Ray’s drink and handed it to Jameelah. She nodded and slowly walked back to the backyard, making sure not to spill her dad’s coffee.

Naima came down the stairs, slightly surprised to see Trent at the door. He looked a little worse for wear, with dark circles under his eyes. He was fidgeting a bit, rubbing his hand over his scarred arm, which is something he only did when he was nervous. “Is everyone okay?” She asked in a hurry, concerned that something had happened to one of their team.

“Yes, yes, everyone is fine,” Trent replied, not wanting to worry her any further. “Well,” Trent sighed, realizing that he already wasn’t telling her the truth. “I need to talk to someone about something personal, and I was wondering if I could ask you for some advice.” He passed her over a coffee, hoping that she would respond with a yes.

Naima nodded and invited Trent to take a seat in the living room. Everyone else was outside, and this was the most comfortable room in the house. “Before you say anything, I want you to know that I will keep whatever we discuss between us, unless I think you or someone else may be in danger, okay?” Naima was a bit concerned about what Trent was going to say, and wanted to make sure that he remembered their responsibilities as medical professionals. 

Trent nodded and told her what had transpired a few weeks ago. He kept the identity of his partner secret, but did make it clear that it was a man. He told her everything about the night of the accident and his concerns that he might have seemed as threatening to his partner. Naima kept quiet for most of Trent’s confession, only prompting him with small questions when he had to pause to keep his composure. “It’s things like these that keep me up at night,” Trent finished, reaching for the box of tissues that Naima had grabbed for him, and dabbing at his eyes.

“Thank you for feeling comfortable and coming to talk to me, Trent. I know that’s not an easy thing to do,” Naima said, reaching over and taking Trent’s hand. “I don’t have a lot of experience in this area, but I can refer you to a colleague of mine who does, with your permission of course.”

Trent nodded, feeling a bit of relief at finally sharing his concerns with someone else. “Thanks Naima, I really would appreciate it.”

“And Trent, I also want you to know, that when you and your partner feel comfortable about coming out to the team, that Ray and I will support you every step of the way.” Naima added, letting a small smile slip at the thought of Trent and Clay dating. While Trent did a good job at hiding his partner’s identity during their conversation, the conclusion was rather simple to make while observing the two men. 

Trent just smiled and thanked Naima again. He and Clay would cross that bridge when they were ready. But he was grateful for the support of his friends and the opportunity to quiet some of his more worrisome thoughts, even if it was just temporary.


End file.
